Thursday, May 24, 2012

For the last few days, Mom has been talking to my baby brother Chris about marrying his lovely girlfriend of 17 years.  She told him that nothing would make her happier than to see him marry Katie before she died. 

So, at about 10:00am the phone rang and it was Katie.  Chris purposed!!!!  And announced that the wedding would be in 2 days!!!  We were all crazy excited!!!  We all love Katie!  So Jill and I got right to work! 

Mom was ready to order a cake and see Kate try on wedding dresses!  We had the hardest time trying to get her to rest.  She didn't want to miss anything! 

We called and maked an apointment to try on wedding dresses and had a time of 6:30pm.  We couldn't get the bakery to make the cake with only two day notice.  So Jill and I made the cake as well as all the flowers.

By the time 6:30 came around, Mom was more than ready to see Katie try wedding dresses.  It was so neat to see mom's face just beaming as Kate tryed on her dress.  By the time she found her dress, (which really didn't take much time at all) Mom was more than ready to go home and go to bed.

Wed. May 23, 2012

Happy 20th Wedding Anniversary

Mom & Jeff!

Today was Mom and Jeff's 20th anniversary.  Another milestone met!  Mom is getting weaker each day it seems, but today she is happy and excited to celebrate their anniversary. 

Jeff surprised Mom this morning with 20 beautiful red roses.  What a great way to start off the day. 

Mom doesn't have much strength anymore.  She really wants to go to dinner with Jeff to her favorite local Italian restaurant, Biaggi's, so she rested most of the day. 

She wasn't doing well that day and we were worried she wouldn't have the strength to go out to dinner, so we cleared off the dining room table and got it read to have dinner brought in for them.

But when the time came, once again Mom was determined to go out to dinner.  We got her ready.  And lifted her into her wheelchair, and they went to dinner.

We planned to have all the kids over for cake when they returned from dinner, so while Mom and Jeff were at dinner, I went to pick up the cake. 

I called early that morning to order a cake in their wedding colors which was red, white and black, that was to say "Happy 20th Anniversary Jeff and Judy".  When I got there there was no cake for us.  So I had to have them write on one out of the display case.  This is what it said when I got it back...

It said "Happy 20th Anniversary Ann, Beth and Judy" !!!!!!  What?!!  After about an hour and 20 minutes, we were able to get a cake that said "Jeff and Judy" on it.  And we will get lots of mileage out of "Ann, Beth and Judy".  Everyone laughed at that one.

It was fun to watch as they once again fed each other cake.  Mom ate her cake and was ready for bed for the night.  Mom received a special anniversary gift that night that the rest of us wouldn't find out about until the next day! 

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Each day is a new adventure as we never can tell how Mom will feel from one day to the next.  So planning ahead for activities is not something we have been able to do very well as of late.

This morning, Mom slept until about 10:30a.m.  When she woke she felt pretty well and decided that she wanted to go with the kids to the zoo.  So, we packed up and went to the zoo.  It was a rather hot day and I wasn't sure how well Mom would do, but as always, she was determined to go.

It was a beautiful day, but very hot!  So we made sure that everyone stayed well hydrated and Mom and Jeff took breaks in the shade.

This picture was taken in the zoo at the pond that Mom and Jeff helped to build.  It was really neat to get there and find out that they were involved in the construction of the pond.  It is a nice pond if you are ever at the Glenn Oak Zoo in Peoria, you might want to check it out.

Mom enjoyed watching the grandchildren play and get excited about the animals.  It was another nice experience with Mom, and Jeff.   

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

On Friday, Mom fell in the night going to the bathroom.  She bruised herself up pretty well but didn't break anyting thank goodness!

We had to move her down to the hospital bed because she just doesn't have the strenth to get herself into her own bed upstairs.  She seems to be getting more confused and a little weaker each day. 

Today she slept until 12:30 pm before she could stay wake at all.  She then had some visitors and stayed wake but stayed in the bed the whole time.  She isn't able to walk much at all now espeically not unassisted.  We have to have someone looking out for her throughout the night so she doesn't try to get out of bed on her own.  She has told me several times this week that she doesn't think she has much time left.  The only time she gets emotional about dying is when she thinks about leaving us kids and family behind.  It's so hard. 

April 2012

I apologize for not staying up to date on the blog.  Things changed so much and were so busy that I have really struggled to find the time to catch things up.  We had two close family members pass away in Feb. and things have just snowballed from there.  So I will now try to get things caught up.

April started pretty well.  Mom was doing pretty well and we were enjoying her and Jeff being back with us and getting back into a routine with chemo and other appointments that go along with this disease. 

I needed a project to work on while we waited through Mom's chemo treatments so I decided to crochet her a white summer hat.  It turned out really cute and Mom liked it.

On April 6th, I came home from a county meeting and received a phone call that a dear friend of mine, Marci, had passed away very unexpectedly.  Mom knew her as well and it really sent shock waves through everyone who knew the family.

The funeral was on April 12th and Mom and I attended.  Marci was just a couple of years older than I was and leaves behind a set of 7 year old twin girls.  The service was very moving.   Our Bishop conducted the service and told the congregation that he had felt the need to pray about what he had prepared to speak about that morning.  He said he felt that something was missing so he asked the Lord what it was He wanted the family and those in attendance to know.  He said the answer came very clearly that he was to tell them that if they were angry it was okay.  That anger was part of the grieving process, and that if they were angry with Him, that was okay too.  But that we should be patient with ourselves and patient with Him.  That he has a plan for her and for us, and if we would just be patient we would be able to see that plan unfold.

That really touched both Mom and I in a very personal way.  I know I really needed to hear those loving words from our Heavenly Father.

Mom had a friend who was celebrating a milestone in her life and Mom wanted to go back to Illinois to support her over a weekend trip.  So after the funeral, I started to take her to the airport.  I was feeling a little uneasy about her going back to Illinois so soon.  She had only been back about three weeks or so.  But Mom was determined!  Well the day was rainy and we were about two blocks down the road on our way to the airport when  huge CAT truck from the copper mine pulled out in front of us.  It was actually just the flat bed of the truck, but that was big enough that it took up all three lanes of Bangeter Highway.  I told mom "I don't think you are going to make this flight now." as the truck could only go about 25-30 miles per hour.  So we went back home.

Mom was determined to get back home, so she had me take her back to the airport the next day and she made the flight.  However, an hour after landing in Peoria, Mom spiked a high fever.  She was shaking violently and vomiting.  She was so weak that Jeff had to call an ambulance to transport her because he couldn't get her to the car himself.

Once again they ran the same series of test they did back at the begining of March.  They put her on antibiotics and got her stablized and she came home on the 17th. 

I had a feeling that I should take the time to go back to Illinois to help Mom get some things done that she had been asking me to do there for a couple of months.  I felt that when she came back to Utah, it would be quite a while before she would be going back to Illinois agian.  So on the 18th of April, I drove back to Illinois with all four of my kids.

An hour after getting to Mom and Jeff's house, Jeff decided to dive off of the one step on to the driveway and cut and scraped his face up pretty well.  He also did a number on his neck an back.  It was a pretty bad fall.  He couldn't move his neck without terrible pain for quite awhile.  He is still having some problems with it now.  I took him to the doctor and they looked him over pretty well and took several x-rays.  Fortunately he didn't break anything.

On April 25, my nephew Bobby came to visit Mom for a while.  They had a nice visit but I could tell mom wasn't feeling quite herself. 

As the day progressed she seemed to decline.  By evening she was running a high fever again and we were advised to have her transported to the hospital by ambulance again.  So we did.  Again they ran all kinds of test and still nothing was showing up.  I called our Docs up at Huntsman and they suggested to have the ER repeat a brain MRI to see what was going on in there.  They did and found that there was a 5th tumor that had developed and another tumor had grown.  They also determined that Mom was having seizures as well.

By the next day, the 26th, Mom was not very responsive.  She was just sleeping.  The nurse came in to try to arouse mom by doing a stirnum rub and pinching her legs and Mom would just kind of wrinkle her forehead.  But she wouldn't talk or wake up.  We were very worried.  She didn't open her eyes or say anything at all until Kate and I went to leave.  Kate said she loved mom and mom told Kate "I love you."  I then went to give Mom a hug and told her good bye and that I loved her and she opened her eyes for just a brief moment and said in a weak voice, "I love you too."  I started to cry and told her she was the best mom I could ever have.  She could tell that I was crying and she reached her trembling hand up to my face and tried to wipe away my tears, and said, " Don't cry baby doll."  Of course I just cried more.

By the next day, the docs had pumped her full of steroids and she was awake and talking again.  That was such a releif!  That night I was going to go up to see her again but it was getting late and I didn't want her to be up late so I called her to tell her I would see her first thing in the morning.  Well she was wide awake and chatty as ever.  I knew this was a golden moment and one that I shouldn't let pass by, so I went up with my brother Dave.  We had the best conversation that night.  The three of us talked until 3:00am!  It was beautiful!  I will always cherish that memory!

The doctors felt that at this point it was time for her to transistion to hospice care.  They released her on Sunday evening and Monday morning Hospice came out to the house.  They went over all their stuff and they handed me a form to sign.  I looked at it and it was a "do not resusetate" order.  I was so not prepared to sign that.  I mean, I know in my head that that was coming and the importance of it at this point, but I didn't realize how hard it would be to actually sign it.

The doctor told us that he thought Mom would have about 2-4 weeks to live.

Later that week on Thursday, May 7th Jeff was really short of beath and having chest pain.  He was trying to mow the yard and would make a lap around the yard and have to come inside to rest for about 30-40 minutes.  Then he started to break out in a cold sweat and got nausious.   So we ended up taking him to the ER to make sure he wasn't having another heart attack.  They kept him over night and sent him home the next day.  They still might end up doing another angiogram on him.

March 2012

On Feb. 28, 2012, Mom went in for her chemo treatment and and her labs came back indicating that her kidney function was not good enough to handle the chemo for that day.  Her creatinine levels were higher than they had ever been at 2.76.  Additionally her blood pressure was rather low.  Jeff had the nurse talk to me on the phone, and after hearing what all her labs were, it sounded like mom needed some IV fluids.  The nurse didn't said the doctor there didn't want her to have any. 

So I called Huntsman to update them and when they heard her lab values they said she needed to have some IV fluids.  I told them that I asked about that and the nurse said she didn't need them, the docs at Huntsman called ICC (Illinois Cancer Care) and told them they recommended mom get a liter of fluids.  So we called Mom & Jeff to go back to ICC to get some IV fluids. 

Well, they had her go back for a liter of fluid on Wed, Thu, and Fri.  Each day Mom was getting weaker and weaker.  She was more confused and only wanted to sleep.  It got to the point that she couldn't get up without assistance and even then it was really hard. 

I told her that she should go the the ER and she stated that she didn't feel confident in the care she was getting here and just wanted to get back to Huntsman.  This was Sat. night and we were trying to get her on the next  flight out of Peoria to Salt Lake City for Sunday morning. 

My sister in law Kate went over to help her get packed while my sister Jill booked mom a flight.  When Kate got to Mom's she noticed Mom was really warm to the touch so she took her temp and mom had a fever of 102.  I told mom she had to go to the ER  now! 
They got her there and Mom's blood pressure was so low that they had two bags of IV fluids running at the same time and one was in a pressure bag to help run it through her faster.  Her blood pressure was 62/38.  They couldn't get it stabilized for quite a while.  Then they admitted her to the ICU.  She was there for 3 days before her blood pressure was stable enough to move her to the oncology floor.  They diagnosed her with sepsis and she was on IV antibiotics for about 5 days.

When she was released from the hospital she had to continue on antibiotics for a total of 10 days.  While she was on antibiotics she couldn't have chemo and would have to wait for at least 5 days after finishing the antibiotics before she could resume chemo. 

By the time she got back to Utah, she had missed almost 4 weeks of chemo.  Mom and Jeff got back on Wed. March 21, 2012 at about 11:00pm.  We were up at Huntsman at 8:00am on Thursday. 

Mom was welcomed back to the Huntsman Infusion room by her favorite nurse Tawnie, with open and outstretched arms.  Tawnie had been such a comfort and great advocate for mom.  We are so grateful to her!

Well mom was doing better, but much weaker and a little slower after being so sick. But we were all glad to have her back! 

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Today Mom and Jeff got ready to fly back to Illinois.  I am a little nervous for them to leave. 

We went to lunch at Johnny Carino's before they needed to get to the airport.  The kids were really excited to go with Grandma and Grandpa to lunch.  We had a nice visit and then it was all to soon for them to get to the airport to catch their plane. 

 When we got to the airport, I really didn't want them to go.  I really had to fight back the tears.  It was just really hard to say goodbye this time. 

Mom was really excited to get home and see the rest of the family.  It has been so long since she has seen everyone.  And there's just no place like home.